Making Me Mom.

I borrowed this post title from Hillary over at the blog "Making Me Mom" (who btw, is in the middle of her second IVF, prayers please!). I just thought it was such an appropriate title, for my second blog post in like a month! I know, I know. Shame on me. How could I let something that was helping me so much, get pushed aside to the "I don't have time" file. But it continued to sit in that pile all week, collecting dust...collecting thoughts...

As you read from my last post, I haven't been feeling all that great. Physically, emotionally, spiritually. I mean, I'm not a hot mess or anything, just kind of blah in the sense that, things still hurt. And I'm just trying to cope and focus on the good things/people around me. A good friend of mine lost her father in a tragic accident this past week. I am so sad for her and her family, and I wish I could just take the pain away and bring her father back to her. But I can't. I wish it was that easy. That we could just wish for something and it happened. It would be lovely to have one of those scary fortune teller machines, like from the movie "Big." How great would it be to have a machine that spits out a ticket and grants your wish. Bring my friend's father back- Your wish is granted. Bring our baby back-Your wish is granted. You get the idea...

My friend "L" found out she is having a baby boy this week! Very exciting! Especially, because she already has a beautiful little girl. So amidst the stressful week and sad news of my friend's father, this baby news brought a much needed smile.

Today is Mother's Day. I'm not as sad as I thought I might be. Last night, my honey brought me home roses as a little "Mother's Day" gift. Actually, a little " You would have been a mother-to-be, and I know you might be sad, but I love you" gift. He's the best. Today, I spent time with family. Hanging out with a great mother, aunt and grandmother. My Aunt Janie is a faithful reader of this blog, and she said she is bored. haha. I haven't been writing much lately. So, Aunt Janie, this one is for you :) This morning I texted my friend "S" and said "Happy Freakin' Mothers Day." This is sort of a joke between us, because she's dealing with similar issues. And she texted me back, saying " At least we have great mothers." She is right. Focus on the good. Focus on the positive things we do have in our lives...

I'm going to try my best, blog world, to start posting again on a regular basis. This Friday is our FIRST ever RE appointment. I am hoping and praying that this clinic is THE one. I really need some compassionate and talented doctors to pull me out of the IF nightmare. I'm also going to start a TTC (trying to conceive) timeline on this blog. I had one on my old blog, but obviously a lot has changed since then! This will just help me and my readers know where we are at with treatment.

I hope you all had a beautiful Mother's Day! I know a lot of you IF bloggers received good news this week, congratulations!!! :) I was really tempted to pee on a stick today (thinking there might be some Mother's Day magic) but I decided against it. Just don't think I have it in me, to deal with possible disappointment. I am hopeful that next Mother's Day, will be one I will never forget...

Happy Mother's Day, Mom. I love you. My mother...my friend...
xoxo