Wednesday, February 9, 2011


Have you ever had one of those days where you just want to crawl into a hole and stay there?

That's how I feel right now. And I'll apologize in advance, for the "downer" post, but I just need to vent.

My day was going fine and then I left work to go to my GI appt and it all went down hill from there. Since I'm not really feeling up to writing an interesting post about how all this went down, I'm just going to list (in order) the events of the afternoon...

-Left work at 3 to go to my GI dr's appt. Didn't get seen until 4:25. The doctor was totally creepy and I am going to get a new GI dr VERY soon.
-I tell him about my Lialda issues and how it doesn't really help, so he tells me to stop taking it and he's going to put me on a stomach spasm med. I get upset because we just spent $50 on the lialda.
-I then tell him about my new thyroid issues and he looks concerned and stares at his laptop for about 10 min. Then he tells me he's concerned I have Celiac Disease. And that he wants me to have more bloodwork.
-I go get the bloodwork but no one sent an order over for it, so I wait forever for them to find it. The lab technician seems nuts. She then has me sign a form for genetic testing. And then proceeds to stab me with a needle, worst blood draw Ive ever had.
-Leave the GI dr's office and realized he never gave me a new script for the new stomach med. Freakin great.
-Realize there are three voicemail messages on my phone.
-One from my fertility clinic. One from the medical company that was supposed to be shipping my trigger shot. And one from a hospital in Hawaii.
-Apparently, the trigger shot I ordered earlier in the day didnt go through. I guess my insurance only covered it one time, so we would have to pay $110 or try to get it through somewhere else. Which I'm in the process of doing.
-The message from the fertility clinic said that we have a balance of over $1200 that needs to be paid before my appt on Friday. WTF. This is the insurance company's fault. That $1200 is covered, there was a just a gliche and things to be be readjusted. So my hubby called the insurance company and they are going to see what they can do. But I have a feeling, something will go wrong and the 5 days of Clomid I just took will go to waste. Very sad.

And here's the kicker...

The message from the hospital in Hawaii went something like this " Hi Sarah (fill in Ex's last name) this is Heather from Tripler Army Medical Center, please call me as soon as possible." UMMMMM WHAT?! For those of you who are confused. I was married before. He and I lived in Hawaii and he was military. So immediately I thought, "Hmm maybe my ex went back there, got injured and I'm still on his contact info?" I really was confused. So I called back. And this is how it went...

Me: "Hi I received a message earlier from Heather, I'm not really sure what it's about."

Nurse: "Oh yes, I'm Heather and what was your name again?"

Me: "Well, my last name has changed but it was Sarah (Fill in Ex's last name)."

Nurse: (in an excited voice) " Oh yes, hi! I was calling about the IVF list here, your name is one of the next one's on the list! Are you still interested??!!"

(Lil' info about this "IVF" list. When I first started my infertility journey, it was there in Hawaii. I was told I should get on the IVF list, because it could take YEARS to get a call. The military offers VERY reduced or close to free IVF cycles if you are picked from this list. And here we are years later, and my name is picked.)

Me: (stunned) "Wow...ummm my husband and I divorced and I am no longer military or living in Hawaii."

Nurse: (sad voice) "Oh Im so I guess I'll just take you off the list then."

Me: (dying inside) "Ok, thank you."

Funny how life works. My name gets picked off a list for IVF, but from a chapter of my life that doesn't exist anymore. I wouldn't change a thing. I love my husband and I love our life together. We'll get our baby...

* I may be MIA from blog world until early next week :( We are moving, and I might not have internet for a few days*


Faith said...

Oh, so sorry hun. As I read this post, I was thrown back briefly to my infertility treatment days. I had days like this one...where everything seemed to fall apart. It's just awful. Hang in there, girl, you are not alone and this WILL pass...and I know it can't be soon enough for you!

Amber said...

Faith already said it so well- this post made me remember those terrible days when nothing seemed to go right at all. One day I pray that you will be able to look back at those as a minor bump on the way to having your baby. Hope things get better really soon!!!

JamieMoore said...

I hope your week looks up!! Have a good move and look forward to the next post!

Jaime said...

Sorry to hear about the rough day, especially the call from the Hawaii hospital. But you could look at it as another sign, just like the picture frame. Now is your time to have a just won't need the IVF to do it!!! Keeping you in my prayers! Have a good move and I hope the appt on Friday works out!

cgd said...

wow, what a day. Hoping things run more smoothly for you. I think this is one of things that other people do not get about IF treatments, you have about 100 balls in the air at any given time and it is like a part time job just to keep up with all of it.
Hang in there.

Amanda said...

Ugh...I can't believe this all went down on the same day. Always how it goes, eh? Today is a new day, and I hope you're feeling a little better.

When are you expecting some results?


manymanymoons said...

I'm sorry, sounds like a shit day to me! Today is a new start and things can only look up. Good luck with the move. Where ya heading?

Moe said...

That sounds so stressful. Ugh. What a sucky day.

I hope your move goes well. Hugs!!