A Buck Fifty

According to my little baby widget thing on my blog, I have 150 days to go before Lil' Miracle arrives. Wow. For some reason, that doesn't sound like a very long time to me. I know it kind of is and come the third trimester I will be all " OMG this is taking forevaaaaaaaaaaa. Come out already baby!." But for right now, 150 days seems doable...

4 days until gender and name reveal! I know you're pumped :) ha. I'm not counting today or Monday. Monday is the actual appointment, but in my eyes it doesn't count. So 4 days!

What are your opinions on taking childbirth and breastfeeding classes? I'm really interested in taking a breastfeeding class. However, I'm still on the fence about childbirth classes. Which I'm sure some of you just gasped. I've just been asking people how their childbirth classes went and most of them weren't impressed. Because basically anything can happen come delivery day. You can practice breathing techniques all you want but they may not become useful. Although, I know some (most) people like to be prepared. So I don't know what we'll do. A lot of people have actually said that when it comes down to the moment, the nurses coach you through the breathing and pushing anyways. I know I probably should take the childbirth class, being this is our first kid and all. But I don't know, still on the fence...

Rockefeller Tree lighting is tonight! I still get so excited for this every single year!! We usually go down to the city around this time and see the Radio City show. But not this year. Which is fine, because walking blocks and blocks around the city while pregnant just doesn't appeal to me very much :)

Never fails...

That you girls are there for me just when I need ya the most...


Thank you all so much for your support and encouragement yesterday after my freak out. Every single comment truly made me feel a bit better. So thank you for taking a few minutes out of your day to stop and help a girl out :)

I am pleased to say that I feel MUCH better than I did yesterday! Not really sure what it was exactly. GI issues? Round ligament pains? Baby growing like a weed? Who knows. What I do know, is that today I feel good. Thank you God! I'm sure that won't be my last "freak out" day but I'm sure glad to have yesterday behind me. Don't really know where I'd be without my husband, my family and my friends (including blog friends!). Can you imagine how lonely and scary it would be to have no one to turn to when things get shitty??

Oh! Many of you will be happy to know that I sent my doppler packing!!! See ya. Merry Christmas and Happy New Year. It's on it's way back to the company! The lil guy just wasn't for me. Was causing me more anxiety and that's exactly what I don't need right now. Ours was a cheap one, so who knows, maybe if it was of better quality it would have stuck around. But our doppler days were short lived. And that's okay.

Thanks again, girls. I love ya.

Having one of those days...

Where I'm freaking out and scared and just want to cry.

I woke up this morning feeling okay, but then shortly after started feeling some cramps/discomfort in my lower belly. It just felt different than the normal GI pain I feel. So I took some Tylenol and laid down on the couch. I ended up falling asleep but when I woke up the discomfort was still there. I keep trying to tell myself it's normal and could just be RLP but I googled RLP and it doesn't sound like this is what I'm experiencing. I'm not doubled over in pain but I'm definitely miserable from the discomfort and anxiety it brought with it.

So I thought I'd check the baby's heartbeat on the doppler. Bad idea. I'm considering returning it because I find it's bringing me more anxiety than excitement over trying to find the hb. I tried to find it and when I found a heartbeat I couldn't tell if it was mine or the baby's. I think it was the baby because it was super fast, but what bothered me is I think it should sound different at 18 weeks than what it's normally sounded like. From what I've heard/read it should start sounding more like a gallop rather than a fast swooshing sound. So I googled it and watched about 5 youtube videos of women who are 18 weeks and using their doppler. And of course theirs sounds like a gallop. What also freaked me out about youtube was there was tons of videos of people at 18 weeks feeling kicks and movement! I'm not feeling any of that.

Today is just a bad day for me. I feel like crap. And I'm thinking the worst. I keep praying to God to please let this baby be ok and let it stay in my belly until the spring. I'll do anything to make that happen. I guess today because of the cramps I'm on the edge. I feel like smashing my doppler with a hammer.

I wish I could just sleep through this until April.

18 Weeks!

18 weeks today! And baby is about the length of a bell pepper. Babycenter says that if it's a girl her uterus and fallopian tubes are in place. Crazy! :) Let's hope (IF it is a girl) that someday her uterus and fallopian tubes don't give her trouble like mine gave me! Babycenter also said that I could start to feel more hungry! Um, CHECK! The last week or so, nothing seems to satisfy me. And then I get hungry again a half hour later! Something else I noticed after I got dressed on Thanksgiving day. My ass is HUGE. Like "Baby got back" huge. I've always had a booty I guess, but oh my gosh, I was just shocked at how much bigger it looks now!! My husband makes me feel good about it, but I literally feel like it's own person! haha

We had a nice Thanksgiving. Very busy as we were running around to three different families, but it was still a nice day. Much better than last Thanksgiving. I went back and read that post and wow...how grateful I feel today!! Have any of you bloggers gone back and read through some of your old posts? It really is amazing. And so very emotional. But it makes me so glad that I have documented this journey. Through the awful times and the amazing times...

Yesterday was my husbands birthday and we decided to go get our tree! We go to the same place we've always gone to and when we arrived today the young kid that's always working there recognized my husband.  We usually  get the "economy" tree. Which is about $25.00. A little Charlie Brown-ish. But still a decent tree and it works fine for us. Well, today the tree dude was like "Go pick out a good one and Ill only charge you $25.00." So we were happy to get such a good deal! Now we have such a pretty tree in our living room! However, the generous tree guy didn't  quite tie the tree onto the car so well. As we were driving down the highway, it started to slide off! I looked out my window and started laughing so hard because the stump of the tree was completely visible through my window! The whole tree had shifted! And it explains while people were cautiously trying to drive around us! Instead of freaking out my husband and I were laughing so hard. He  did pull over once to try and fix it but it wasn't quite working. So our solution? Open the sunroof and hold part of the tree down as were driving. Hey, it worked. But it was hilarious. We made it home. With the tree in one piece. :)

Happy Birthday...

To this guy....

My wonderful husband turns 31 today!! I love you so much honey! Thank you for being a dream come true and then some! What an exciting year we have ahead! You are going to be the best Daddy, I just know it :)

Happy Birthday, love.

Thankful.

Today I am thankful.

I'm thankful for so many things...

My wonderful husband...
My loving and supportive family...
My friends (including blog friends!)...
A roof over my head...
Food to eat...

But this year, we are extremely thankful for this little guy or girl growing in my belly. We truly know what an amazing gift this is and we are thankful for this miracle! It's been a long road but we are finally here. We are finally on our way to meeting our baby! And I will spend forever giving thanks for that....

Happy Thanksgiving everyone! :) Time to watch the Macy's Parade and then we are off to visit with family!

"Throwin' It Out There" Tuesday

I'm making up another "bullet points" day because.. I can :)

• A dear friend of mine got really great news today and I couldn't be happier! She just did her first IVF the other day and they were only were able to retrieve one egg :( Which isn't ideal, but we all put a lot of prayer and hope into this one miracle egg and thankfully it fertilized! So they are doing an early transfer tomorrow to give this lil embie the best chance possible!! It only takes ONE. So I am praying that this baby is her take-home baby!!! 
• I think I may have felt movement last night! Not completely sure, could have totally been gas or something. But I was sitting on the couch and felt this little "Pop!" feeling and fluttering after it! Hmmm. Guess there's no way to know for sure. And I've heard if your a little heavier it's hard to feel movement this early, so who knows. 
• A friend of mine asked me how my stomach issues were doing. Well, the past couple weeks I've been feeling pretty good overall!! No pain or stomach issues. Although, I've been having a bit of insomnia even though I get really really tired. I was so glad to be feeling better  and then just yesterday the stomach issues came back :( I hope it goes away by tomorrow because I really don't want to feel this way for Thanksgiving! 
• I went with my almost 90 yr old grandmother to her doctor's appointment Monday morning. She's so funny and was charming just about every doctor and nurse in the place. When her doctor walked in (who was a good looking older man) she said to me " Isn't he cute?" The doctor laughed. And then she says "Doctor you look like you could be on Grey's Anatomy." LOL. How my grandmother knows about Grey's Anatomy is beyond me :) Just when you think she might be losin it, she surprises us by saying something like that! 
• I feel like these last two weeks before we find out the gender is going by soooooooooooo slowwwwwwwwwww. I guess that's what happens when you are really looking forward to something. 
• I'm back to craving pickles. I was craving them early on and then it just stopped. And now I need them again! 
• Anyone see the Pampers "Peace on Earth" commercial with all the sleeping babies??? Tears. And more tears.
• Looking forward to putting away the fall decorations on Friday and getting our Christmas tree!! 
• My husband and I FINALLY cleaned out the spare room (which is going to be the nursery!) and it felt great to get that done!! Pretty exciting and amazing that in a few months it will be a whole new world in there!

An Award!

Jenn over at the blog ...so this is love... gave me this lovely award this morning! It feels good to be loved! :) Thank you Jenn! According to Jenn's bloggy friend who gave the award to her, Liebster is a German word meaning beloved or favorite...

I now pass this award onto the following five bloggers!

1-Good Timing over at the blog ~Love Grows Love~
2-Shannon over at the blog Solo Pronto
3-E over at the blog Many Many Moons
4-Sailor's Sweetheart over at the blog Living out of a suitcase
5-Chon over at the blog My Path to Insanity & Beyond

Please pass on the Liebster lovin'!

Copy and paste the award on your blog.

Thank the giver and link back to the blogger who gave it to you.

Reveal your top 5 picks and let them know by leaving a comment on their blog.

Hope that your followers will spread the love to other bloggers

17 weeks!!

Today I am 17 weeks!! Baby is about the size/weight of a turnip!!

Don't think I've ever had a turnip before. Is it a fruit? Is it a vegetable??

I've read that I could start feeling movement. And I've read up on what to pay attention to. The feeling of a goldfish swimming in my stomach, or popcorn popping or a butterflies feeling. I'm not really sure if I've felt any of these things yet. But I also read it's hard for people to recognize the movement if this is their first baby. I can't wait to actually feel little kicks!!

Have a great weekend everybody!

Well, my Christmas shopping is done...

Last night I was watching TV and a commercial came on for a product called "Forever Lazy." It's an (adult) fleece footed jumper that has a BUTT FLAP (yes you read that right) where you can unsnap and go to the bathroom! At first, I thought maybe this was a joke. But it turns out to be a real product that they are selling. This thing is so ridiculous! You can't help but laugh at it! I mean, come on, how lazy do you have to be to have butt flap lounge wear?? However, I now know what I'm getting everyone for Christmas this year. Kidding, kidding...

I feel like I've been a really boring blogger lately and I apologize for that. I just think I have a lot on my mind and sometimes blogging can go either way with me. When my mind gets racing, sometimes I'm into "blogging it out" and other times I just prefer to remain quiet. I still try and comment as much as I can on other blogs, but sometimes I guess I get writer's block. I feel like I used to blog about semi funny/interesting stuff and now most of my posts revolve around pregnancy. Which I don't want to sound like I'm apologizing for, because that has been my goal and we finally got our miracle! So I feel very blessed. However, I do know that some people who are still waiting/trying find it kind of boring or annoying to read about sausage fingers and nausea. I'm also using this blog as a way to document this journey. As you have probably read, every Saturday I graduate up a week, so you bet your ass you can expect a post where I'm comparing the size of my baby to a fruit.

I seem to have more energy lately, which is great. Although, at the same time I find myself extra tired. That really doesn't make any sense. But I guess what I mean is that since I have more energy I push myself to get out and do more, but then I tend to overdo it, and I become EXHAUSTED. Also, I don't sleep well. Up a lot  to pee and then I toss and turn. And I've been getting up super early everyday. So I'm definitely not getting enough sleep. I try to take a nap here and there. But the past week or two I have been super tired. And really really hungry all the time! I can almost say that I am sick of eating. Sometimes I really do not want to eat anything more, but I get so hungry and then I start feeling sick if I don't give in to the hunger. Times like that I try to just eat some crackers or some baby carrots, but a lot of the time I need something more substantial or I'll just end up needing to eat again in 15 minutes!

Anyone watch Private Practice last night? Well, Addison is doing IVF. The first time didn't work but then she transferred two snowbabies and at the very end of the show she takes a pregnancy test on Thanksgiving. All they showed was her looking at the test (which we couldn't see the test) and then sort of smiling. So I assumed that meant she was pregnant and I was SOBBING. Doesn't take much to get me to cry these days, but there's something so special about someone who has struggled and then their dreams finally come true! Even TV characters :)

17 days until we find out the gender of Lil Miracle. Can't wait!

My Mitts

I've always had small "stumpy" hands. I'm about 5'0 short tall and my hands are small. Yet, as I've been gaining weight they are blowing up into all new proportions! My rings are getting really snug. And they've gone from little sausages to what I'm now calling "my mitts." I used to get acrylic nails put on to "lengthen" the look of my fingers. But that got way too expensive to keep up! So, now here I sit, staring at my mitts. And thinking to myself, "Who cares, you've got a baby in your belly!"

I'm just not going to be one of those women who's body carries pregnancy with grace. And I'm okay with that. I finally had to break down and get new sneakers, because none of my shoes fit my comfortably. I was still trying to rock flip flops on the warmer days and then an old pair of sneakers on the cooler days. Normally I wear a size 7, but had to get and 8 1/2 in the new sneakers! They are a little loose, but much more comfortable and will give me room to grow. And then I have a pair of black high boots that my mom so generously bought me. Even those had to be purchased at a plus size store thanks to my giant calves! Sigh.

Keep growing baby. As long as you are growing, Mommy can deal with all the things that are growing on her! :)

The Crazy Woman at the OB's office

And no, it wasn't me :)

I walked into the waiting room (aka the slow cooker) this morning and there were four people in there. A  crazy woman and her two year old daughter and a very pregnant woman and her friend. I got a bottle of water and sat down in a chair. The "crazy" woman was chasing her daughter all around and talking very loudly to her. As the rest of us were watching the TV and minding our own business, the woman started making comments aloud about the TV show. I mean, really loudly, as if she was talking to the rest of us and hoping we would acknowledge her and strike up conversation. She kept at it too, to the point of complete awkwardness. I could see the very pregnant girl and her friend eyeing each other like as if saying " She's weird." Normally, I'm a very nice person and don't mind making small talk with strangers if they seem like nice normal people. But I just sensed something so weird with this woman, that I chose not to make any eye contact with her in hopes she didn't start asking me questions. Sadly, the very pregnant girl made eye contact. And then all her personal business was then spilled to us all in the waiting room. The "crazy" woman starting attacking her with questions . "When are you due? Is this your first? What hospital? Girl or boy? Are you going to breastfeed?" And on and on she went. The very pregnant girl was nice about it but I could tell she felt weird about it. THEN, another pregnant girl came out into the waiting room from the exam area with a long scroll of u/s pictures. She sat down minding her own bizznus. But then....she made eye contact with crazy woman!!! Crazy got up from her chair and walked over to her to look at her u/s pictures!!! And asked all the same questions she just asked the other girl! I couldn't believe how nuts this woman was. I really felt bad for her daughter. Does she not have any social boundaries? The second pregnant girl with the u/s pics wasn't as friendly to her as the other girl because I could tell she definitely sensed CRAZY. So I'm sitting there trying so hard not to make eye contact, as I'm sure I was next on her interrogation list. And then by the grace of God, the nurse opened the door and called my name!!! Close one. I just don't understand some people! Some things are personal and not everyone wants to dish their info to complete strangers! Ok, just had to vent about that...

My appointment went well. Blood pressure was down to 122/74 which she was happy about. Pap came back normal. Thyroid is stable. I can't believe our next appointment will be the BIG ultrasound!!! :) Well, I pray that's our next appointment as I don't really want to end up back there before then! I asked her opinion on stretch mark creams that work well and are safe for the baby. She basically said that they usually don't work that well and to stick with anything inexpensive because some of them are $$! She said any kind of hydration on the skin helps. Regular lotion even. So I think I might just go with cocoa butter.

I have been sleeping like crap. Up every hour to pee and tossing and turning a lot. Sometimes when my stomach doesn't hurt (which is rarely) I try to fall asleep on my stomach because I seem to sleep better that way. Am I hurting the baby if I sleep on my stomach at 16+ weeks? I know people have told me to sleep on my stomach while I can! So I'm trying to do that, but it still makes me nervous.

16 weeks!

Today we are 16 weeks! Baby is about the size of an avocado! And is starting to grow toenails!

My mom and I found the cutest most perfect baby picture frame today! But I'm not going to post a pic of it until December 5th after our "big" ultrasound :) It's so perfect in so many ways!

Has anyone seen the Google Chrome commercial with the Dad writing (typing) letters to his daughter???? I was SOBBING :)

Scary!

What kind of baby monitor do you have??


Check this out...

I dislike co-pays

Nothing like paying someone $30.00 to tell you what you already know. Blahhh....

We have pretty good medical coverage, but for every single doctor visit we have to pay $30.00. And that adds up when you are sometimes visiting the doctor 2-3 times a week. It was really awful during fertility treatments where we were having to pay $30 every other day for monitoring. Oh well. Had to be done, but it just really sucks to have to dish out that much money.

I just got back from the GI doctor and basically they can't really do much for me while I'm pregnant. All I can do is increase my fluid and fiber intake. Use heating pads. All things I have been trying to do. He said that with the previous GI issues it is possible for me to experience pain like that. They want me to have a small bowel series done after the baby is born. I didn't expect the doctor to hand me a miracle pill, but it's a bummer that I just have to "deal" with it if the pain comes back again. The good news is that my blood pressure was down today! 122/74 today when it was around 144 /93 earlier in the week! So I was happy about that. Although, I could feel my heart racing and the nurse said my heart rate was 88 bpm. Which I didn't really believe, because it felt much faster and my heart rate is usually in the 90's to 100. Related to thyroid issues I believe.

Next appt: Monday at the OB for a blood pressure check! Got my tent and marshmallows ready :)

p.s. I think I'm starting to experience heartburn for the first time. Never had it before. But yesterday and today I've been feeling this like burning feeling in my esophagus? Heartburn I guess. And how could I forget...

Happy Veteran's Day! Thank you to all our military. And thank you to their families who sacrifice and serve as well!

TVT

• Today I was trying on a shirt in our full length mirror (a mirror which I try to avoid at all costs nowadays) and I look at my stomach and I see these almost black and blue lines. What the heck is that?? OH. It's STRETCHMARKS! Surprisingly I am not freaking out about this. It shocked me, yes, because I haven't seen seen such defined stretch marks on myself before. But in a way, I was happy. Because that means the baby is growing and my body is growing and stretching for the baby. Now, in a few months I may change my tune when they are all over me, but for now, I'm like eh whatever....
• I'm interested to see where my blood pressure is at on Monday at my appt. On Tuesday I went to Rite Aid to use their blood pressure machine and it was a little higher than the day before. Great. I'm hoping it goes down to a reasonable number. I don't want to be on blood pressure meds nor do I want any complications with the baby. 
• Tomorrow morning I have an appt at the GI doctor, to see if they can figure out what's going on with my stomach. Thankfully, I've been feeling a lot better this week, but I'm afraid of that pain coming back! 
• 25 days until we find out the gender!! :) 
• Heard Christmas music on the radio today and I LOVED it. Yes, I'm one of those people who are already thinking about and planning for Christmas even before Thanksgiving gets here. Sometimes I feel bad for Thanksgiving, like it gets jipped.  But I do have a Thanksgiving tradition (that my mom started when we were little) where we make cinnamon rolls and watch the Macy's parade in it's entirety. I love watching it every year! 
• It's about time for my 4 o'clock feeding. I am hungry alllllll the time. Not to mention, I'm in the bathroom peeing alllll the time. It's crazy. But it is what it is. 
• My hormones have taken a plunge into the deep end. I cry just about every day over one thing or another. Last night I actually cried watching the CMA's. Every song I heard just seemed to be the most beautiful song I've ever heard. 
• It's about time for my 4 o'clock feeding.

Poem

I posted this poem back in January. I found it on another blogger's site and it really resonated with me. I was in a dark place at the time and angry with God. I felt like my dreams of becoming a mother would never come true. I'm hoping this poem helps someone else out there who feels...well...broken...




Broken Dreams


As children bring their
broken toys
with tears for us to mend,
I brought my broken
dreams to God, because
He was my friend.
But then, instead of
leaving Him,
in peace, to work alone;
I hung around and
tried to help,
with ways that were my own.
At last, I snatched them
back and cried,"How can you be so slow?"
"My child," He said,
"What could I do?
You never did let go."

20?

If you haven't heard the latest Duggar news...

They are pregnant with their 20th kid.

Holy crap.

And that's all I have to say about that.

Camping

I'm seriously considering setting up camp in the OB's office waiting room. Complete with a tent and a little grill for roasting marshmallows...

Thursday I was at the OB, Saturday I was in L&D, and today I was back at the OB. Today was a scheduled appointment. However, the waiting room was standing room only and the wait was over an hour. You know what bothers me? When there are guys in the waiting room sitting in a chair and they don't offer their chair to a very pregnant person who's standing! So rude. I did have a seat, but I was constantly observing who I might offer my seat too. Like an old lady or a 9 mth pregnant girl.  When I finally did get called back they had me pee in a cup, blood pressure, blood work, baby doppler, and a good ole pap! The baby's hb is good. My fav NP has a feeling it's a boy, she said not to hold her to it but she just gets the feeling it's a boy. Anyways, everything went ok except for my blood pressure. The first nurse took my blood pressure and said she was gonna come back after my exam to take it again because it was high. She asked if I had a headache, which I didn't. And when my fav NP came in she was like "Holy cow with the BP girl!." I was feeling a little anxious and nervous and I don't think the hour long wait helped things, but they took it again a little while later and it went down a little bit but not as much as they would have liked. So she said she wants me to go home and find a zen-like state for the rest of the day and to come back Monday to have my blood pressure checked again. Do you see why I am considering setting up camp there? I'm always there!! This doesn't surprise me much though, as I'm used to heading to the fertility clinic every other day for so long....

Yeah, I'm a little nervous about the high blood pressure, but I'm not going to let in put me in freak out mode. Sometimes my BP was high at the fertility clinic too because I was always on edge there and nervous. Oh and I had something else done today....

A flu shot. My first one EVER. This should be interesting. I had a hard time coming to a decision on whether I wanted to get one or not. I did a lot of research on it, asked a lot of people their opinions, friends, family, medical professionals, google. And the consensus was...get one! So I did. I thought about waiting till December maybe but I knew I would be just as nervous then and I should just get it over with. The kind they gave me was thermasol (sp?) free. I don't regret that I got one. I'm actually glad I did. I am going to be pregnant right from the start of flu season until the end of it. I still prayed like hell this morning that this baby stays safe with me getting the flu shot. Matt got his first flu shot a few weeks ago, too. I'm sure we will be fine. My reasoning is, is that God forbid I didn't get a flu shot and caught the flu and had complications and lost the baby, I could never forgive myself. If I (God forbid) lost the baby from getting a flu shot, at least I would know I was trying to protect it. The were just too many reasons to get one than to not get one. So it's over with.  It's done with. I know it's a personal decision. All will be okay :)

15 weeks & a visit to Labor and Delivery...

Today we were supposed to be celebrating 15 weeks!  The apple of our eye! As the baby is about the size of an Apple by now...

I'll start off by saying the baby is okay. For that we are thankful. But after 4 days of being in complete agony, we decided it would be best to take a little trip to the ER. Which landed us in Labor and Delivery for almost 5 hours. It was a really frustrating experience and we've pretty much decided that we don't want to deliver at this hospital. The mid-wife was a b*@$& and basically made us feel like we were stupid for even coming in. It's a long story, but basically my (usual) calm and polite husband wanted to rip her face off. They didn't do an u/s or an internal exam, which bothered me. All they did was blood work and checked for baby's heart beat on the doppler. I've been having all over stomach pain for four days now. At the OB on Thursday they thought it was RPL and digestive issues. But the last few days, I have been in so much pain that I couldn't take it anymore, we just wanted to make sure the baby was okay and that it there wasn't something awful going on with my organs. The blood work and urine test showed everything was okay. And that my gall bladder and liver function was normal, so that was good news. The bad news? I left there in just as much pain as I went in with. It's horrible. L&D thinks it's my IBS issues and says I should see my GI doctor next week, which I'm doing. But this is so scary and frustrating. It's hard to even function like a normal person :( Monday I have another OB appt and then I have an appt at the GI doc on Friday but I am going to try and get it moved up. I can't live like this. I keep getting the feeling it's more than just IBS issues, because I've never felt this kind of pain before. But if everyone is saying the baby is okay, I'm just going to have to trust that....

I think visiting Labor & Delivery is one of the most awful things in the world, unless you are about to give birth to a full term baby or you are visiting someone who is about to give birth to a full term baby. Anything other than that is really scary and depressing. They put us in this birthing suite that full of birthing "things." A bouncy ball , a little baby crib where they take care of  the baby after birth, a "contraction" tracking machine thing....

I don't want to have to be in an L & D room until April. And to be completely honest, I was so sad thinking there was a chance I would be giving birth today. With the amount of pain I'm having, I thought for sure that was a possibility. But thank God, our little apple is fine...

I said to Matt jokingly on the way home, " Honey, I think this child may be an only child."

The Slow Cooker

I had an "emergency" appointment at the OB's office today. I've been feeling like crap this week. Having a lot of stomach pain, which I thought wast digestive issues. Since the beginning of this pregnancy, I've had issues like that but this week it got worse. Wednesday I could barely move. I couldn't sit down and be comfortable I had to either lay down or stand up to tolerate the pain. It isn't a "doubled over" kind of pain, but enough to make me miserable and waddle around. TMI, but constipation is a common side effect of pregnancy, but I feel like I have some extreme version of it. Not so much the constipation part, but some strange digestive problem that wants me to suffer on a daily basis. I did have stomach issues (IBS) before pregnancy so I'm sure that's not helping things. My next OB appt is scheduled for Monday and I debated waiting until then and just try to "ride" this out. But I knew that wouldn't be smart in case there was something wrong with the baby. So I called to see if there were any cancellations. The receptionist said they didn't have any openings but that I could talk to a nurse if I wanted to. So the nurse and I talked and she thought it would be best for me to get checked out and miraculously there was an opening in the schedule. Sense my sarcasm there? They had an opening for Friday, but then she said if I can get there by 2:45 today there was a cancellation. So I took it. I was worried though, because I did take Miralax yesterday and this morning to see if it would "help" my stomach issues. And I was afraid of crapping my pants on the car ride up there. haha. Yes, it was a legitimate fear! My husband was on a job in Vermont today that he was just finishing up so he was upset that he didn't think he'd make it back in time to go with me to the appointment. I told him not to worry about it and I'd be fine.

So I get up there and I walk into the waiting room, which I've now nicknamed "The Slow Cooker." It's a tiny closed in waiting room and it was probably 2000 degrees in there. No windows. And there's a huge flat screen TV on the wall that's probably giving off a ton of heat as well. I nicknamed it "The Slow Cooker" because it's hot in there and it takes a long time to be seen. There's always a wait. But I don't mind this that much because that means they are taking there time with each patient and I appreciate the extra time they take with me while I'm in there. There's also a small "wine" type fridge in there where they keep water bottles. But the bottles are never cold. I still take one because its a free bottle of water, but drinking warm water to me is like drinking your own saliva. Anyways, I'm sitting there wondering all the horrible things that could be going on in my belly or with the baby, and who do I see walk in the door? MY AMAZING HUSBAND. I think my heart swelled up 3 times it's size just seeing his face. He had rushed back from Vermont because he didn't want me to be alone at this appointment. Now, THAT...is love:)  I'm a lucky girl.

The appointment went pretty quickly. Peed in a cup, they took my weight, they checked baby on the doppler....

And baby is GREAT! Heard the heartbeat at 155-160 bpm! :) At our last visit it was 180 bpm on the u/s machine. I now know the sound Ive been hearing at home on the doppler at home is definitely the heartbeat! And then she talked with me about my pain. The diagnosis is: Digestive issues combined with round ligament pain. The downer is there's nothing I can really do about it, besides all the things I've already been doing. Heating pad, don't eat certain foods, take Miralax everyday if I want to...

So, there's no miracle pill for this pain. It's pretty scary and frustrating to feel like this everyday, but I'm so thankful the baby is doing well. I just kept thinking that there's no way my stomach can hurt this much and the baby is still okay! But he or she is perfectly fine! :) 

I decided to keep my original appointment for Monday, because I mean, who doesn't love a good ole pap? And I think I'm due for blood work. So back to the "slow cooker" in a few days. Oh well, I'm wanting this month to go by quickly so we can get to the anatomy scan in December. I knew today if they couldn't find baby's heartbeat on the doppler they would probably do an ultrasound. And would be able to tell the gender by this point. But I was so grateful she found it on the doppler, even though it would have been cool to get a sneak peek at the babe! 

I'm praying this pain goes away. It's really hard to function while feeling like this and I'm waddling around like I'm 9 mths pregnant already. I just want to feel good. This second trimester is supposed to be the best one! :) Did you hear that, stomach? :)

Money Tree

If anyone comes across one of these, please notify me of the exact GPS location. Thanks so much.