GD sucks.

I think my head is still spinning from my GD appointment today. What I took away from today is that GD sucks...

First I met with Dawn (my endocrinologist) who also handles my thyroid issues. But she also takes care of diabetes patients as well. She had told me that if I did end up having GD she would monitor that too for me. I like her a lot. She's kind of young and really easy to talk to. Although, today when she asked me if the nurse weighed me I said "No" and she said " Oh well we weighed you a few weeks ago when you here right?" and I said jokingly "Yeah, but you might need two scales by now!" And she burst out laughing, and continued to laugh a little too long and a little too hard. It was was awkward. But whatever...

So she showed me how to test my blood sugar. Which I have to do FOUR TIMES A FREAKIN DAY. And I have to keep track of it all and email it to her at the end of the week. My blood sugar was just fine when I did it in the office. And then I tried doing it at home by myself after lunch and I almost bled out! I don't think I put the blood drop on the strip correctly because it wouldn't show a number! So I kept trying to squeeze blood out to get it on the strip and ended up with a blood covered hand. I'll try again after dinner. But oh man, this sucks. I am NOT a needle person and having to do this four times a day does not bring me to a happy place.

Then she had me meet with the nutritionist. Which was a blast. That was sarcasm by the way. She was an older lady, kind of nice but  kind of "judge-y" too.  Like judging all my eating habits. Which I know aren't stellar, but hey, nobody is perfect. For example, in the early morning I am starving so I usually have a bowl of cereal and milk after my husband leaves for work. And I usually eat Cheerios which is like one of the healthiest cereals. Turns out that's the worst thing someone with diabetes can eat in the early morning, cereal and milk. Because I guess it spikes your blood sugar. She said I could have it as a snack, but it's not good for breakfast. Great, that's what I've been doing for almost 8 months now. She then gave me all kinds of packets and books and information on what to eat and what not to eat. I sued to do Weight Watcher's and this seems a lot harder to follow. Basically, it's just choosing healthier options but it will also increase our grocery list by 70% with all the healthy things we need to buy. So that's another thing budgeting to make sure we can afford it all! She also said that I should cut back on juice or maybe cut it out completely. Which made me want to cry. Because I LOVE orange juice. Seriously, I don't know how I could live without it. Since my GD diagnosis I have been buying the "less sugar" brand. But I don't think it's something I could cut out completely. I asked her what I should be drinking. She said I could have crystal light, seltzer water and water. I bought some flavored seltzer water today. Blueberry and Cranberry Lime. Both just taste like water with bubbles.

I know I can do this. Make some little changes and test my blood sugar. I don't have much longer to go in this pregnancy. But still, it sucks. I am hungry ALL the time. And it seems like all things I ate that I thought were healthy to stop my hunger, aren't so great. It's not like I'm eating cake and ice cream all day long. I try to make good choices. But I guess they're not good enough. So I'm just sad about it. I would have like to spend the last few weeks of pregnancy not stressing and obsessing about things.

They also took more blood today. I have to go back to the nutritionist in two weeks and I have to email my  blood sugar levels at the end of each week. They said that if my levels look fine after awhile I might be able to cut back on testing so much. That would be so nice! She said hopefully I can avoid having to take insulin shots, but we won't know for sure until we see how my levels are looking.

I'm just wishing I didn't have GD :(