Thursday, April 28, 2011

Peace of Cake

In honor of NIAW (National Infertility Awareness Week) I went and got myself an IUI #3 :) Totally planned it that way. Ha. Not so much.

This morning was a "peace" of cake.

It went so well. And very, very different. This whole cycle was different. I'm going to take that as a good thing. No, a great thing.

Last night my husband brought me home roses and a card because he felt so bad about not being able to be with me for the IUI. He left for Syracuse this morning for an over-nighter with work. But not before handing over the "goods." ha!

After driving through a monsoon on the way to the clinic, I was so thankful to have just arrived in one piece and to have the "goods" safe and sound. I had visions of getting into a fender bender or my car breaking down or a cop pulling me over. I actually played out the convo between me and the cop in my head. " Um, sir? Can you please hurry it up with that ticket? I've got sperm in this bag that needs to get to the clinic ASAFP!" (As soon as f****** possible). But thankfully none of those scenarios occurred...

Now, is it a good thing or a bad thing if the nurses and front desk people know you by name?? I guess it's kind of nice, but then again it must mean I am there wayyyy too much :) As I was sitting and waiting, a cute little toddler was running around the whole place. She was super cute and I chatted with her a bit. But I was like is this for real? I'm pretty sure that when I have a child and if I need further help with conceiving a second child...I will not be bringing my child there. I guess just out of respect for all the women and men there who are desperately trying to have a baby. It's just we go through so much, I feel like it's the one place that should be free of babies and toddlers all up in your face. I know some of you might think Im horrible for saying that, but it's just how I feel. I mean picture this, a cute little toddler running around the waiting room, when you've just learned your cycle failed. Or that you miscarried. It's a difficult situation, to learn the worst news of your life and walk out of the exam room to a room full of kids. And I know some people like to bring their babies back to the clinic to show the doctors and thank them. But I think when that day comes for me, I'm going to send a beautiful picture and thank you note instead.

Anyways, back to my IUI story. Usually, I sit on the same side of waiting room every time. But today I sat on the other side on one of the comfy couches. There are two doors to baby making land. And I was thinking today, that I've never been through the "other" door to the "other" side. I've always assumed that was for IVF and all the "bigger" procedures. All the sudden the door opens and a nurse wearing a scrub hat (or operating type hat) calls my name. What? Me? Through that door? To that side? I was so shocked I almost stumbled over the footrest getting up :) My last two IUI's had been done in regular "everyday" exam rooms. The nurse was so nice and she brought me back to this bigger room that looked more like a mini operating room. Much different looking that the "everyday" rooms. I asked her if it was the retrieval room and she said they did transfers in there. I immediately imagined happy couples watching their embryos being transferred on the screen. But today I was just getting an IUI. A life changing IUI. And so she got started. My husbands sample was "fabulous" she said. And I have to say it was the best IUI I've had. Very quick, not too much discomfort and when she left me there to rest for a bit they had calming music playing. Something the other side doesn't have (besides in the bathrooms). I really could have fallen asleep. She had dimmed the lights, the music was playing and I just kept visualizing the conception of our baby! Sounds kind of weirdo, but I was. It was just so peaceful.

I have today off from work and I plan to do absolutely nothing but rest and let my body do the work! No cleaning, no laundry, nothing. Just taking it easy and hoping for the best :) It's stormy here, so its the perfect day to do that.

May 12th is beta day. A few days after Mother's Day. Hmm. :)


Amanda said...

What a perfect IUI! Like you, I seriously have SUCH a good feeling about this one. I'm so glad it went so well and you were feeling relaxed and happy throughout.

I completely agree with you about kids in the waiting room. I can't believe people do that. You would think that fellow IFers would know how much this hurts, but I guess some people just forget once they get to the other side.

Will keep my fingers crossed until May 12th!! Will you hold out until then, or POAS?

Amber said...

I am SO glad everything went well for you today and I pray that you'll see a BFP for Mother's Day. How wonderful would that be!

My RE has time set aside for you to bring your baby in to see him when no one else will be there. It was a great chance for us to get pictures with him but not hurt any feelings. Maybe yours will have the same. Obviously I would never take her with me to an appt in the future! Crazy people!

Christa said...

Congrats on the IUI! I've had that pretend conversation with a cop that involved tears and an explanation of my infertility. I'm sure we're not the only ones!

I gave you an award so come on over to my blog to accept!

Seriously?! said...

So excited for you! Rest up and let implantation begin! I bet that's happening very soon. ;)

Mike Castellanos said...

I agree with the baby/kid free zone in the clinic. Going through this process is challenging and being confronted with a beautiful baby as you walk our the door with unfortunate news isn't the best thing. Of course you can walk outside of the clinic and a child be there but it's a unique situation.

Glad that it went so well. Excited to read how everything goes :)

Lauren said...

That sounds like it went so perfect, I'm sooo happy for you! May 12th can't come soon enough!!!!

Josey said...

Lots of wonderful, positive things in this post!! Praying this is your last 2ww for a long time!

Carlia said...

i loved this post! the part about you getting to go through the other door cracked me up! i'm with you on the not bringing kids to the RE. my clinic specifically asks patients not to, but i've still seen a couple. it doesn't bother me too bad most of the time, but when i'm hormonal...yeah, not a good time to see kids. good luck and happy 2WW!!!

L said...

I'm so glad your IUI went well! Hopefully this is it.

I also agree with you about the kids in the waiting room. It's just really hard to see when you want that for yourself so badly. When we went for our IUI there was a couple there with a kid too. He was probably around 8 years old, so not as upsetting as a baby or toddler, but still, who brings an 8 year old to that kind of appointment (it was a Sunday so I would assume they were having a procedure done and not just there for fun).

Moe said...

Um I'm loving this story!! I really really really hope that this is it.

And I'm totally on your side about bringing kids to the waiting room. I haven't even been in that situtation yet...and I already know that it would be so incredibly hard for me.

So glad your day went well and that you didn't get pulled over and have to talk with a police officer about "the goods"

RMCarter said...

My clinic knew me by name too, and I worried they had seen to much of me. But no, I think they remembered your name because they like you. :)

Agreement on the kids in the clinic thing. Wrong on so many levels.

I got a comforting feeling reading this. I just feel so positive about this cycle. I thought about you today and was happy to read how well it went.

Anonymous said...

I in the waiting room should be illegal! It is just mean :(
I am sooooo happy things went so perfectly for you! I will be thinking about you and praying for you for the next 2 weeks! xo

Jenny said...

haha I've totally had that pretend conversation with the cops!

There were often young kids at my clinic as well...I have to admit it surprised me that people would bring them there.

So glad "the other side" was a nice peaceful place and that the IUI was a pleasant experience for you. Definitely rest up and drink LOTS of water every 4 bottles/ day if you can!
*fingers crossed* for you and lots of sticky babydust

Faith said...

So glad it went well!!! EEEEK!! I can't wait to hear good news from you!!!

I agree with the no kids in the RE clinic. My friend's clinic actually had a no children rule in their welcome paperwork and said something like: we're so happy you have been able to have a child, but please be sensitive to those still waiting for their miracles, or something like that. I thought that was brilliant. I would never bring my babies with me if I were to go again. I sent an announcement and a personal note to my RE, for both babies, and my RE sent beautiful silver spoons for each one of them. I don't know how people feel ok with bringing their kids, I really don't...

Hang in there during the 2ww, girl!

Carpenters said...

Your story of today was so great! Sounds like a perfect day to conceive..and i am praying for you! I am so proud of how relaxed you were...and I am hoping for a Mother's Day BFP for you!!!