Friday, May 6, 2011

Believing

I'm choosing to believe.

I'm choosing to believe that this may have actually worked. That next Thursday I will have good news to share. Of course, there are some minutes in my day spent second guessing things. But most of the minutes in my day have been spent excited at the possibility of everything finally coming full circle...

Things have been happening. Little things. Little signs e-v-e-r-y-w-h-e-r-e. And if I typed them all out they might seem silly to some people. But to me they have been so encouraging. And I think I'll keep them to myself :)

Although, I'll share the latest with you...

My husband told me tonight that the weirdest thing happened to him. Last night he had a dream. And to many of us, there's nothing weird about having a dream. They happen. But my husband says he rarely dreams, or if he does, he NEVER remembers them. He said that last night he dreamed that I woke him up in the middle of the night and told him I was pregnant with twins. And this morning he was so confused as to whether it was a dream or if it was real life. But he said to himself " No it had to have been a dream because she would definitely NOT be sleeping right now with news like that." :)

I love signs. And they've been happening all week. Of course, there is a part of me that is scared to revisit that extremely sad place. Scared to feel angry, foolish and heartbroken again. But I am going to choose to believe that I'm pregnant. And hope that it all works out.

I just have this overwhelming feeling like everything is coming together. As if it's our time...

I have been having some physical symptoms, but of course they could mean many things as we all know. I do have a question for any of you that have gotten pregnant. I can't remember the first couple days of my first pregnancy (because I didnt know, so I wasnt paying attention). But did any of you have slight cramping on your side rather than in the middle? Sometimes it all over. Sometimes I feel it just on one side. Of course, the "believer" in me at the moment is thinking it's implantation. Hoping it's implantation and that baby is settling in for the long haul.

I'm hoping to catch up on all your blogs this weekend! I have been going to bed pretty early every night. I've been so tired. It's been 5 days without caffiene, and I'm doing really well without it actually. A little more tired, but that's ok.

Goodnight! Sweet dreams :)

11 comments:

amiracle4us said...

Keep believing!!!

Jillington, a.k.a. the Polack said...

Thinking of you often. All fingers crossed here.

Faith said...

Yes! I had cramping on my sides each time I got pregnant. Good sign:). I'm so happy you are having signs, can't wait for the big announcement:)!

Jes G said...

Stay positive lovely lady!!!! hoping that your husband's dreams do come true! xoxo

beauty and insanity wrapped into one said...

i had cramps the day i found out i was pregnant & then afterwards, it was usually on just one side and then the other... :) stay positive... and like everyone else.. sending good thoughts and looking forward to hearing great news!!! xoxo

cgd said...

here's to hoping!!!!!!!

Good Timing said...

I love this post about believing, so true! I love signs, whether they be physical symptoms or things you see or hear or dream. They give us hope and what are we without hope? Crossing my fingers that this is it for you!

p.s. Came here via Amanda. :)

Amber said...

I love this post! And I had the same incredibly positive feeling the month I found out I was pregnant with Paisley, so I'm hoping it turns out the same for you... :)

L said...

Keep staying positive! Yes, I also had cramping on the side during my TWW when I was pregnant. I also had really sore, heavy boobs - that seemed to be the strongest symptom for me.

kkasun said...

Good for staying positive~!!!!!
I hope all of these signs do add up to a BFP for you!!!

foxy said...

It can be so hard to hold the faith, and you are doing an amazing job!

As crazy as it may sound, I always loved our 2ww. It was the only time that I ever really felt hope. Knowing that there was a very real chance of pregnancy, that the odds were actually in our favor, I just bubbled over with faith and hope during those waits. I loved them so much that at times I wanted to wait to get news, just so that I could keep pretending, and hoping.

These sighs sound awesome. the universe communicates in mysterious ways!