I'm not really sure why or how it happened. But I feel as if someone has literally sucked the hope right out of me. Today was a really tough day. All the hope and positive thoughts I have been having went out the window. Why the sudden change? I have no idea. Maybe I'm scared.
But it's an awful feeling. I spent the majority of the day angry, sad, and pretty damn sure that this didn't work. And then I was a crying mess when I finally got home...
I refuse to take a test and all I can do is wait for Thursdays beta. Truth is, I feel nothing. No symptoms at all. All those cramps and twinges I was feeling days ago are gone. Boobs don't hurt at all. I've only been slightly more tired and that is probably because I have been without caffiene. I feel like as I was sleeping last night someone came in and sucked all the hope out of my heart.
This sucks. We put 120% into this. Everything.
I know we could still be surprised. But my heart is telling me it's over.