Friday, October 21, 2011

I have not forgotten

Tomorrow, I'll be 13 weeks into this pregnancy. And I've been wanting to write this post for some time now. Not about getting to 13 weeks, but about the fact that I have not forgotten what it feels like to be waiting...

Waiting for your BFP or adoption match. Waiting for it to be "your turn." Waiting for your own miracle to happen.

I have not forgotten about all the tears I shed. I have not forgotten about all the BFN's. I have not forgotten about our loss and all the heartache we've endured.

Most of all, I have not forgotten that hope got me through. Anyone reading this right now, who is still waiting, don't give up hope. It will happen. Sometimes, when we are at the end of our rope and don't see the light at the end of the tunnel, it can be so devastating. Trust me, I've been there. I was there for a long time.

I guess the point of this post, is to tell you that miracles do happen. Smiling becomes a regular part of your life again. And life starts looking up.

Pregnancy comes with it's own scares and worries and fragile days, too. But I am so grateful to finally have gotten our miracle. I know how lucky we are. Our one and only chance at IVF worked and I know that doesn't happen for everybody.

So, for those of you still waiting, just know that I pray it's your turn soon and that I have not forgotten what's it's like to be in your shoes...

9 comments:

Chon said...

oh heavens did you just read my mind, glad I read this one this morning. xoxo

Diana said...

We will never forget :')

Jamie said...

Those of us still waiting truly appreciate the preggos who remember what it feels like to still be waiting. So happy that you are 13 weeks!!

marg said...

So happy for you Sarah (and Matt). It was great to see you, and the cookies.

amiracle4us said...

I agree with Jamie...thanks ;)

Faith said...

I could have written this myself - I feel so, so blessed. And I want people to know that happiness WILL happen again for them. Miracles CAN and DO happen every day. It's hard to hold onto hope, but absolutely essential when waiting for your miracle. Well said:). Yay for 13 weeks:)!!

Shannon said...

Oh honey bunny. How I needed to read this today. I woke up today knowing it's CD3 and time to start my new medication. Each cycle, when I have to start this madness, I get so scared and angry and anxious...because I know I am putting myself in a place that COULD possibly lead to a lot of heart pain. I may get pregnant, but then I might miscarry again. I might NOT get pregnant. I might get pregnant and stay pregnant-which would be amazing. The chances of one of the other two happening are more likely though and KNOWING that I am putting myself in such a vulnerable position scares me to death. I needed to read about a little hope today. Thank you.

Jenny said...

you will never forget that painful time in your life...one day you'll wake up and it will all seem like a distant dream (nightmare) and the hurt is overshadowed by the joy...but it's always there.
There is always hope and I think it's the only thing that keeps us going...I never believed in miracles, but they do happen. One way or another every woman dealing with the pain of infertility will find happiness in their life again...it's only a matter of time.

Auntie A said...

That brought tears to my eyes- it's' like you were speaking right to me today:) Congratulaions!!!!